So when someone close to you is in tremendous pain or angst you, unfortunately, can't help but be absorbed into it too. At least that is the way my relationships play out. I am often found musing why God created us to be relational and yet knowing it sucks big time when things are in a scary place. He knows He made us this way and I know it but it doesn't make it any easier. Sometimes I cry out and challenge His reasoning for giving us all these damned emotions. Unfortunately I am too emotional at the time to hear the answer.

Today at work I shared some of my personal struggles. I felt like I was in the spotlight and all my friends around me were squinting from the bright light beating down on me. The light made them just as uncomfortable as it did me but in a completely different way. Focussing on other's troubles can temporarily cause you to forget your own but later the new level of transparency changes things.

A scab is hard and crusty for a reason. It protects. Pick it off and the wound seeps its puss all over. Opening up to others can feel like newly exposed flesh wounds. I know it has benefits but the pain can seem unbearable.

Caroline

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