I would title this, “I am a dork", but I think I have already used that one. I feel like the Israelites pacing restlessly at the foot of the mountain while Moses is getting some pretty important face time with God. When will I ever learn?

Backing up, I went to a life changing writer's conference at the beginning of the month. I will never be the same. I went alone. I am a novice. Those two things alone would have scared some but I persevered and stuck it out there and had the time of my life. Amazing people, challenging teaching and motivating speakers made my time priceless.

One component of a good conference is time with some of the power people of the book industry. You stand in line and fight for a time slot so you can embarrass yourself by stammering and stuttering and ineptly explaining whatever piece you brought to sell. A claim of further interest is the goal but second place might be a referral by someone with some clout. I really didn't get either but the one card I did get with some nice contact info on it is now lost. Thus, the "I'm a dork" comment.

So days of berating myself has gotten me nowhere except to the realization that if God wants my book published, it is not all going to hinge on a silly little business card. Oh, God is way bigger than that. Let's see how He does this! I rejoice in the results even before they have been revealed.

Caroline

In the next several months I anticipate a wave of new people exploring my website and reading my blog. Sometimes I enjoy reading past entries to remind myself how I am evolving. Recently I reread my New Year's encounters and saw that although I was on the Truth Box regarding my personal drinking, perhaps I should explain my stance on this subject.

First let me say that I believe the Bible is clear about drinking to excess. It is never o.k. to do this. I believe the Bible does not condemn all drinking but it definitely gives guidelines for behavior in this and many other areas. Perhaps my account of the bourbon drinking left the impression that due to my sadness of the holiday season, I was driven to drink. If that was anyone's take away, I feel badly.

I have alcoholism in my family. I am well aware of the dangers of regularly imbibing. I also am aware that leaders are called to behave far above the norm. I take these facts very seriously. I said in the post that I did not over indulge and I meant it. Perhaps discussing controversial things can put one's reputation in danger. Many would feel silence is the best plan when it comes to dipping into the gray areas (from man's perspective) of God's Word.

But when you strive to live your life as an open book in front of others and then you write a book about standing on the Truth Box, you have to trust God for grace from the critics and mercy from the offended when you tell the truth!

Caroline